xtcbackporch

Jeff Truzzi

You could be famous of obscure.
You could be filthy rich or destitute.
You could be powerful or disenfranchised.
You COULD be whatever.
But guess what you CAN do?
You can kiss Simp's fat hairy ass, that's what!

Now, in the UK, I believe it would be 'arse-kissing.'
Which sounds much more polite.

And this is only a partial list so far.
I'm sure I've forgotten a few people.
So feel free to add to it.

People who can kiss Simp's ass:

Igor Zhivotovksy
James Carville
PUMA
Dick Cheney
Kid Rock
Phil Collins
Gilbert O'Sullivan
Bill Kostelecky
Youie
Katie Couric
Leona Helmsley
Ian Reid
Ronald Reagan
The Artist Currently Known As Prince
Lou Dobbs
Arnie Lipkind
Richard Bransen
Kenny G

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Don't let the picture fool you!
Inside, I'm tanned and handsome.

keltik · Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:23 pm Post subject:

Well, I voted to do so providing enough money changes hands, But if McCain wins, Simps can kiss my hairy ass AND suck my sweaty balls!

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And what made me think we're any better,
And what made me think we'd last for ever...?

longinglook · English Settlement Joined: 09 May 2008 Posts: 285

Okay, I hate to be the voice of reason again but I object to a thread of this questionable nature residing in the fans section. The vast majority of people on Mr. Truzzi's unfortunate list are not, in my opinion, true fans of XTC. Nor do I think that kissing simpleton01's ass is an activity that real XTC fans would either appreciate or condone.

Geez, where's the moderator when you need him?

Now, if you wanted to start a thread about XTC fans who want to kick simpleton 01's ass, you might be able to get away with it in this section. You could also probably put youie on that list, too. But that, my friends, is another thread for another day.

Jeff Truzzi · Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 11:15 pm Post subject:

Uh, this is supposed to be a list thread,
not an opinion thread,
thank you very much.

And youie not a true fan of XTC?
Boy, it's a good thing he's not around.
Or there'd be a big, fat, hairy, multilingual, Lebanese Kiwi ass longing for lip lock.

Jeff Truzzi · Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 11:23 pm Post subject:

longinglook wrote:

Geez, where's the moderator when you need him?

He's busy moving Mr Tein's threads.

AnotherSatellite · Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 3:47 am Post subject:

Does the "kissee" get any say in this, or does he just drop 'em?

Seems the man would have some opinion about who smooches his hams.

Should we submit them one by one for his approval?

How about Putin? Would you turn your back on him long enough to let him pucker up?

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Les Kendreaux: doing pretty much as we please since 1983.

Spastic Minnow · Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 4:08 am Post subject:

whoops, misread that as "people who can kick simpleton01's ass"
that Katie Couric is pretty scrappy.

_________________
...in my pants

Jeff Truzzi · Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 3:58 pm Post subject:

AnotherSatellite wrote:

How about Putin? Would you turn your back on him long enough to let him pucker up?

Best face forward?

simpleton01 · Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 5:26 pm Post subject:

Damn, if I were only more flexible, I’d kiss my own ass. Is that why people do yoga?

_________________
They say that patriotism is the last refuge
To which a scoundrel clings.
Steal a little and they throw you in jail,
Steal a lot and they make you king.

spidermage · Skylarking Joined: 13 May 2008 Posts: 924

I'd kiss simp's arse, but I'm afraid that I'd be blinded by the sun that shines out of it.

_________________
I'm not a girly penguin, I'm not a girly penguin.

longinglook · English Settlement Joined: 09 May 2008 Posts: 285

Jeff Truzzi wrote:

And youie not a true fan of XTC?
Boy, it's a good thing he's not around.
Or there'd be a big, fat, hairy, multilingual, Lebanese Kiwi ass longing for lip lock.

I only said that the vast majority of the people on your list were not true XTC fans. I didn't say everyone one the list wasn't. Pay attention, Truzzi! Of course I count youie as a true fan. And Leona Helmsley.

Jeff Truzzi · Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 3:27 am Post subject:

longinglook wrote:

Jeff Truzzi wrote:

And youie not a true fan of XTC?
Boy, it's a good thing he's not around.
Or there'd be a big, fat, hairy, multilingual, Lebanese Kiwi ass longing for lip lock.

I only said that the vast majority of the people on your list were not true XTC fans. I didn't say everyone one the list wasn't. Pay attention, Truzzi! Of course I count youie as a true fan. And Leona Helmsley.

Thanks for the clarification, longinglook.
I thank you, and youie (wherever he is) thanks you.
Wink

How 'bout Ian Reid and Richard Bransen?
They must be XTC fans...or former fans, anyway.
Lord knows they made a chunk of change off the lads.

dixidoo · Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 3:01 pm Post subject:

Simp could kiss my ass. I've seen his photo and I think he's cute.

longinglook · English Settlement Joined: 09 May 2008 Posts: 285

dixidoo wrote:

Simp could kiss my ass. I've seen his photo and I think he's cute.

Of course you do, dixi dear. But this is exactly why I think a thread devoted to those who want to kick simpleton's ass might be popular among some forumers.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to fleeing for my life.

Terra Incognita · Oranges and Lemons Joined: 12 May 2008 Posts: 1246

Is there a list of people who can kiss the asses of those who can kiss Simpleton01's ass? Doo-dah, doo-dah...

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